Andy J Ryan Apr 26, 2023

Jarvis Cocker – Metro Theatre, 8 December, 2009

M.Craft, who may be better known to those of a certain vintage as 1/4 of the eternally underrated 90s band Sidewinder, opened proceedings playing his deft acoustically-driven tunes with minimal backing. It is fair to say he didn’t entirely capture the crowd’s attention, getting his biggest cheer when he mentioned that he was also guitarist for Jarvis Cocker. “I get two paychecks this way” he might’ve said if he was a cheap laugh connisour who had wasted too much of the 2000s watching The Simpsons,

The curtains were drawn and the anticipation rose immeasurably. A single spotlight cast a circle of light in the centre of the red velvet. Drum beats began, the light strobed and Jarvis Cocker jauntily leapt through the parting curtain to a heroic cheer and began pointing individually at members of the crowd uttering a different name each time. The gesturing and name calling became louder and more frenzied, before a riff rang out from the dark duh, du duhhh and Jarvis leapt up in one sweeping arc landing with his long bony finger set straight into the crowd and screamed out for the one name he had been longing for all along, Angela!

The next song was introduced by Jarvis advising that today was actually ‘candy floss day’ in the United States, and coincidentally, was also the anniversary of the Pearl Harbour bombings, and perhaps that was a bit serious so they needed something a bit lighter to commemorate.
I don’t mean to be so ‘English’ so soon and mention the weather but it’s really hot.
Pulp’s best moments were when Jarvis was at his most sexually exasperated, his solo work is no exception, with a feisty ‘Fucking Song’ introduced with a haughty “With this song I’m going to have sex with everyone in the room, the sound is going to go out and penetrate your earholes”.
I went to the Zoo today, and saw some kolas, and apparently the reason they sleep for 20 hours a day is that the one and only thing they eat requires all their energy just to digest it. Why wouldn’t they just eat something else?Like chocolate? At which point Jarvis took a chocolate car out of his coat pocket and took one square out and ate it before giving the rest to someone in the crowd with instructions to share it out to everyone. He then produced another bar and took it to another section of the audience with the same instructions, but adding “your job is a bit harder as that’s a flake”.
How do you feel about audience participation? Cause we couldn’t really afford to bring a full male choir with us on tour”
“all songs are autobiographical to some extend, and none moreso than this one” – I never said I was deep
One part of growing old is that you reach a point where you accept jazz into your life, you get to an age where you suddenly say ‘Kenny G come right in” and you start to embrace saxophones.

M. Craft, once one-quarter of seminal '90s band Sidewinder and current Jarvis guitarist, opened proceedings playing his deft acoustically-driven tunes with minimal backing, evoking a polite response from the crowd.

The curtains were drawn and the anticipation built. A spotlight cast light in the centre of the red velvet. Drum beats began, the light strobed and Jarvis Cocker jauntily leapt through the parting curtain to a cheer and began pointing individually at members of the crowd uttering a different name each time. The gesturing and name calling became louder and more frenzied - "Sandra", "Renee", "Michelle" - before a riff rang out from the dark ... duh, du duhhh ... and Jarvis leapt up in one sweeping arc, landing with his long bony finger set straight into the crowd and screamed out for the one name he had been longing for all along - 'Angela'!

The thing with seeing Jarvis Cocker is, the actual songs are only a tiny percent of the whole Jarvis experience. His pre-song introductions covered everything from the fact today was 'Candy Floss Day' in the US (conjured to lighten the mood of the nations as it was also the anniversary of Pearl Harbour - he theorized), the diet of koala bears, and the weather - for which he apologised for being so 'English' for mentioning it. And then there was the dancing, which I can only describe it as a mixture of dapper disco moves muddled with overly-excitable tai-chi breakdowns and illusionist-standard hand tricks.

Pulp's better moments were when Jarvis was at his most sexually exasperated; his solo work is no exception, with a feisty 'F---ing Song' introduced with a haughty "With this song I'm going to have sex with everyone in the room, the sound is going to go out and penetrate your earholes".

'Homewrecker' was hilariously prefaced with "one part of growing old is that you reach a point where you accept jazz into your life, you get to an age where you suddenly say 'Kenny G come right in' and you start to embrace saxophones".

There was the rather stomping coupling of 'Fat Children' and 'Black Magic', the twisted-disco of 'You're in My Eyes' and a fitting finale of 'C-s' are Still Running the World' ending an utterly fantastic and uplifting set from one of the icons of our time. The enduring appeal of Jarvis is that while everyone finds complications in their life, and begrudgingly endure the ritual and routine of daily life, very few can express and observe them so saliently, and set them to songs so engagingly.